Yeah, I have an earliest memory. It was way back in the orphanage in Bordeaux. I had already been adopted, but I went back there for an appointment with a psychologist - it's a routine check-in and an opportunity to tell them how things are going in your new home. So my earliest memory is the room at the orphanage where I had slept. I was born in Bordeaux and arrived in the orphanage at seven days old, and I was adopted five months later. My bedroom there wasn't decorated very well - it was an orphanage, not a five-star hotel. There was a terrible bed, not ugly but anonymous. It looked like that because they don't want it to feel permanent; they're just hoping that the babies in those beds are going to find a family - like I did.
When my parents arrived at the orphanage there were lots of babies, but they said that when they saw me, they loved me from day one. When I was living at the orphanage I was always crying - which is weird because I'm not the kind of guy who cries - but when I saw my parents, it was the first time I had smiled. I smiled at my mum and they loved me, and they said, "That's the baby we want." The manager said, "Yeah, but he's black, are you sure? We have so many other, white babies." And they said, "No, no, no, we want a black baby."
So they got me, and visited me several times a week until the paperwork was processed, and that's when this love started to build as a family. I arrived at their house in 1986, and a black baby going to a white family was unusual, especially in Bordeaux, which is really conservative and Catholic… really Catholic! So they had to face so many things. Rather than thinking I was adopted, I thought, "They love me, they are my parents." But from about aged 10 through to high school, people would say, "Oh, you're a bastard, your parents are white and you're black," or "Your mum slept with a black man," or "Your dad was with a black woman." It was really complicated.
My father's name is Bruno-Jean and my mum is called Lydia, and I think they were really hot when they were younger! My dad looks like a typical Frenchman - he has this long nose and brown hair. My mum was a really beautiful woman; she had curly hair and green eyes. They are a beautiful couple.
My mum had cancer when she was 15, which resulted in her not having any ovaries, so she had to adopt. When they first fell in love at that age, my dad didn't know she had cancer, but once she was diagnosed he was always with her - through the chemo and the treatment. He protected her from everything, and she said to him, "But you won't have a baby, at least not with me." And my dad replied, "Let's adopt a baby." Which I think is a more amazing story. He was only 18, and he was facing something like that. Sometimes I wonder, would I have made the same choice?
My mum got better and they started to have their own life. They're very liberal. They have this really open-minded feeling - they love new things, but at the same time they're kind of scientific and more mathematic. Whereas me, I'm the crazy one of the family! I'm so French, I'm so inspired by Paris and Bordeaux - the architecture, the rich culture of my country - but at the same time, I feel like there is something that is part of my blood which feels more exotic, more diverse.
After I left the orphanage I grew up in a perfect house. I had my bedroom and I had a salle de jeu (playroom). I was really spoilt. I had everything I wanted, and if I didn't have the right present, I would scream. I was a naughty only child!
I went to a state primary school - that's the cool thing about my parents, they wanted me to feel like everybody else - and after that I went to a private high school.
Growing up, we were pretty wealthy; my dad is from a family of boulangers. So they made a lot of money from baking in Bordeaux. I was a prince! My parents wanted to satisfy me so much, like, every time. My mum always says, "You chose us, we didn't choose you." At school, my dad wanted me to do something scientific and mathematic, and I was pretty good at mathematics, but my grandma is really into fashion. My mum, no, but my grandma, Suzelle, always believes that she is hot. Even when she was 60 years old, she was still going clubbing with me and my friends.
She loves Chanel pearls, and she is beautiful; she gives me so many tips on how to be. She was always a coquette; she was the one who actually drew on her legs to make it look like she was wearing stockings, she was always putting on make-up and was really flamboyant.
I remember going to the opera with her - that was when I realised I was gay. There were the little binoculars at the opera, and she was talking about the ass of the dancer - I mean, she was literally, like, fiftysomething and she was talking about the ass of this 25-year-old boy. I was like, "Can I see the costume?"
I know that in her youth my grandma was in love with a black man, but my great-grandmother said to her, "If you marry this black man, you are not part of the family any more." I think that was the big sadness of her life. I know that my parents, when they adopted me, said to my great-grandmother, "If you once say anything about the colour of our kid, we won't see you any more." So from that moment I was more than welcome.
When you have to face life's big difficulties, ones that are way worse than a bad collection review, it makes you stronger. A bad review is less painful for me than what I experienced at 10 years old. I was really into fashion, and kids at school said, "If you love fashion, you're gay." High school was the worst.
I didn't know that I would be good at fashion design, I still don't know if I'm good at it. But I always knew that I wanted to create beautiful clothes. I realised that clothes are important because they give you an identity.
I find women really inspiring and I have a big crowd around me but, at the same time, I love my moments alone. I can have two sides. I can share so many things and be so communicative with Instagram, with people, with my girls, with everything, but I know how to keep secrets. Instagram is an amazing door, and I think I'm an open person, but I don't give or guarantee my brain or my heart.
I think, when I was a kid, I was looking more to the past, but now I'm looking more to the future. I think I was growing up with so many doubts. But my doubts became my strengths, and I'm deciding now to actually enjoy the present, and have an eye on the future more than the past.
When I was adopted, the law was more geared towards the rights of the biological mother than those of the child. If the woman didn't want to be found or leave any kind of identity behind, she didn't have to.
Maybe at one point, when I have kids, I will decide to look for my birth parents, because I don't want my kids to feel lost without their identity, when they maybe ask me, "Where are you from? Why do you have those eyes? Daddy, do I have your eyes?" Maybe that will be the moment where I will decide to actually start a big research into who my birth parents are. For now, I think I am happy and satisfied with what I have already.
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